Skip to main content

It’s ok to ask for help; parenting is hard work

As a mum of three young children, I know firsthand how tough parenting can be. 


Between the sleepless nights, temper tantrums, and endless piles of laundry, it’s easy to feel like you’re drowning in a sea of responsibilities. But here’s the thing: you don’t have to go it alone. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. And trust me, you’re going to need all the strength you can get on this wild ride we call parenthood. So let’s talk about why it’s ok to ask for help, and why doing so might just be the best thing you can do for yourself and your family.



Being pregnant, going through labour and delivery and then bringing home a new baby can be overwhelming and exhausting yet joyous and magical. During this time it is common for mums to put the weight of the world on our shoulders. We try to take on it all, often to the point where our own basic needs are not being met. You often hear mums say that they never get to have a hot meal or a hot cuppa or even get to have a shower, because the needs of others take over meeting their own basic needs. Asking for help isn’t selfish. It doesn’t matter if you would like help simply during a difficult period or on an ongoing basis to keep on top of things.  I’m here to remind you to ask for help. 





Here are 9 ways you can ask for help:


1. Clarify what you need

Being clear with what you need is important. The people offering help will have different views on what may need to be done with a new baby in the home. Give them some ideas of what would help you. 


2. Keep your to-do list handy

You probably have a running list in your mind with all the small tasks that need to happen during the day. Keeping a to-do list is a great way to keep your thoughts clear and to take the burden off of you when giving out tasks to the people offering help. Keep that to-do list visible by either having a note book on the kitchen bench or use a magnetised white board on your fridge. The to-do list allows helpers to pick something to do without having to ask you. 


3. Don’t be afraid to follow up

If you find that some clothes have been put into the wrong drawers or cutlery put in different spots, don’t be afraid to follow up with the people helping and let them know. Make sure you give feedback in a polite way, some may take offence. 


4. Use a meal service  

Think about Meal Train, which is a fabulous website for coordinating home-cooked dinners from family and friends. 


 5. Use social media 

Social media can be a useful tool to connect with a community of like- minded women who also have recently become mothers. Facebook Groups for example can be a great source of camaraderie and a place to get support and questions answered.  


6. Outsource your needs

It’s important to note that you can’t do it all. If you find that there are things outside of caring for yourself and baby piling up, you can outsource some tasks to make sure you are not overwhelming yourself. It is common to outsource gardening, some cooking, cleaning and even things like ironing. 


7. Try a support group

During pregnancy you may have been linked to a mothers group. Groups like these are set up to provide support to you when you come home with baby. You can lean on this group on women with your thoughts, your feelings and to help you through any stage you are going through because they are going through the same thing. 


8. Reach out to a professional

We rely on professional support from doctors, nurses, midwives and obstetricians to help through pregnancy, it is less common to access help from professionals once baby is here. You can reach out to a GP, a counsellor or psychologist, an obstetrician, a lactation consultant, a paediatrician, a midwife (CAFHS), or a baby sleep consultant (to name a few) 


9. Work through your feelings on accepting help

It’s not uncommon for people to feel slightly uncomfortable accepting help from others during pregnancy and when baby comes home for many reasons. You may feel you should be able to do it all, the people helping may not do the tasks the way you would or that you will be judged for accepting help. Working through your thoughts and feelings is important. 




Reminder

Here is your reminder that asking for help isn’t selfish. Allow yourself to accept the help that is offered or seek help if you need it. 















Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Famous movie quotes to improve your mood

Movie quotes are a powerful tool that can inspire, motivate and entertain us.  They are often memorable, catchy, and can evoke a range of emotions from laughter to tears. Whether you are a movie buff or not, chances are you have heard at least one movie quote that has stuck with you. One of the reasons why movie quotes are so powerful is that they can represent universal truths or insights about the human condition. For example, the quote "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get" from the movie Forrest Gump, speaks to the unpredictable nature of life. Similarly, the quote "May the Force be with you" from the Star Wars franchise represents the idea of relying on inner strength and guidance. Movie quotes can also inspire us to take action and make positive changes in our lives. The quote "Carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary" from the movie Dead Poets Society, encourages us to live in the moment and...

Embracing 100 Small Things in Life for Self-Discovery, Growth, and Love

Hello there !  Embracing the positivity in life can truly transform our journey. As I reflect on the power of focusing on the good things, it becomes evident that this mindset shapes our perspective, fostering self-discovery, growth, and love.  There are many reasons to prioritise the positive, here are a few: 1.  Enhances Well-Being:  Shifting focus to the good promotes mental and emotional well-being. 2.  Strengthens Resilience:  It builds resilience, helping us navigate challenges with a positive mindset. 3.  Fosters Gratitude:  Appreciating the good cultivates a sense of gratitude, enriching our daily lives. 4.  Improves Relationships:  Positive energy contributes to healthier and more fulfilling connections with others. Now, let's explore 100 things to be happy about, categorised to cover various aspects of life: Nature and Surroundings: 1. Sunrise and sunset hues 2. Blooming flowers 3. Calming ocean waves 4. Starry night skies 5. G...

How a morning and night journaling routine can help reduce stress

Journaling is an excellent way to reduce stress, gain insight into yourself, and improve overall mental health.  However, finding the time and motivation to journal can be a challenge. One effective solution is to create a morning and night routine for journaling. Carving out a dedicated time in the morning and evening to help unclog your brain and focus on what you would like to achieve isn’t as hard as you may think. It can take as little as 5-10 minutes at a time.  Here are some simple tips to get you started. Morning Routine:   Focus on checking in with yourself, positive affirmations, goal setting and self care Begin your day with a check in on how you slept.  Getting enough sleep is crucial for our overall well-being and is essential for optimal brain function, memory retention, and emotional regulation. Checking in with yourself each morning can help you identify any patterns or issues with your sleep that may be affecting your mood, energy levels, and overall...

Embrace Serenity: 7 Mindful Exercises to Nourish Your Soul

Hey there!  Are you ready to embark on a journey of self-discovery and inner peace? If you're seeking ways to reconnect with yourself and cultivate a deeper sense of well-being, you're in the right place.  Today, I'm thrilled to share with you seven transformative mindfulness exercises that will help you tap into the serenity within. 1. Dive into Mindful Breathing Let's kick things off with a timeless classic: mindful breathing. This exercise is as simple as it sounds – just take a moment to focus on your breath. Find a comfortable position, close your eyes, and tune in to the sensation of each inhale and exhale. As thoughts drift in, gently guide your attention back to the rhythm of your breath. It's amazing how something as natural as breathing can anchor us in the present moment and calm our racing minds. Benefits of Mindful Breathing: - Reduces stress and anxiety - Enhances focus and concentration - Promotes relaxation and inner peace Tips for Practicing Mindful...

6 YouTube channels that focus on Self Growth

If you are here, then you are interested in finding a YouTube channel for self growth. Pursuing self-growth is one of the most worthwhile things you can do for yourself. Not only does it help you grow as a person, but it can also lead to greater happiness and fulfilment in life. One important aspect of self-growth is the notion of lifelong learning. This means that the process of learning and growing never stops, no matter how old you are or how much you think you already know. There is always more to learn, and by embracing this idea, you open yourself up to endless possibilities for personal growth. Lifelong learning can take many forms. It can involve taking classes or workshops to learn new skills or gain knowledge in a particular subject area. It can also involve reading books, watching documentaries or YouTube, or listening to podcasts to expand your understanding of the world around you. But lifelong learning isn't just about acquiring new knowledge. It's also about bein...

5 Ways to Let Go of Partner Resentment and Build a Stronger Relationship

Have you ever felt a twinge of resentment towards your partner?  It's a common emotion that can creep into even the strongest of relationships, leaving us feeling frustrated, misunderstood, and disconnected.  But here's the thing, resentment doesn't have to be the downfall of your love story. In fact, it can be a catalyst for growth and deeper connection if managed effectively. Join me on a journey to explore five powerful strategies to navigate partner resentment and cultivate a relationship filled with love, understanding, and harmony. Understanding Partner Resentment: Before delving into the solutions, let's unpack what partner resentment really means. It often stems from unmet expectations, unresolved conflicts, or feelings of injustice within the relationship. When left unaddressed, resentment can fester and poison the connection between partners, leading to distance and disengagement. However, by shining a light on this emotion and actively working through it, we...